Wednesday, December 31, 2003

God wants to wrestle

"And Jacob was left alone, and a Man wrestled with him until daybreak." -Gen. 32:24

I was awakened this morning with this word from the Spirit
That God wants to wrestle.

He desires those who have some fire within them.
He wants those who have some fight in them.
Where are those who have hot passions?
Where are those who want something so bad they will wrestle God for it?
Where are those who can be broken and still not give up?
God has come to wrestle you...He wants to stir you up.
He wants to see what you got, what matters to you, what you will fight for.

What do you want?
What does your heart long for?
What are you passionate for?

I have been listening to Beethoven lately and last night I watched "immortal Beloved", a movie about his tumultuous love life. In one scene, Beethoven is teaching a young lover to play piano. In the scene, she is playing with no enthusiasm.
He comes up to her and chides her with these words:
"It's your lack of passion that is unforgivable...I must beat you for it."

LOL! I laughed when he said that.
This morning I had to ponder, how we too, can so often live such passionless lives.
Oh God forgive us for living so cold.
Wrestle me until something is lit again that will burn in a manner worthy of the ALL CONSUMING FIRE.

To my friend Darin, who is fighting a good fight against MS:

You will find a fullness in this season like never before.
The ability to drink deeply of everything He has placed around you that is worth drinking from.
Live Full my brother,
eat the best of the land,
love passionately,
think deeply,
play hard,
speak what your heart says to speak.

Embrace the Wind,
and let it's wild strength carry you to wherever His intent is.
Do not fear this storm, it will hold the power in it's fury,
to take you where clear skies never could.

My prayers are supporting your dreams my brother...

Monday, December 29, 2003

Moods of Tiger
"Where is one that, born of woman,
altogether can escape from the lower world within him,
moods of tiger, or of ape?"
-Alfred Lord Tennyson

Emotions and passions...
A strange and dangerous celestial fire that God kindled in the breast of mankind.
The heavenly fire can shed penetrating illumination to the depths of ones soul.
But it can consume the weaker life as quickly as stubble is swallowed by flame.
From what fiery torrent did this Divine tongue ignite?
What kind of Mind lights such a fire, knowing the hunger of it?
What wisdom kindles such madness?
What pounding heart released such a thundering company of wild stallions?

A greater love than worlds could ever know...
Yesterday, I preached a message called "Pouring Oil and Wine." It was a message about discovering and releasing the "oil and wine" the Lord has placed within us into the wounds and hearts of those "half-dead" around us.
I read this commentary this morning and found certain parts that really accentuated parts of the word I gave. I have been pondering this line of thought for a while.
Fighting the cultural numbing of our heads and hearts. Learning to awaken more refined pleasures and pursuits. Seeking to not be dulled so much by the artificial that I no longer can be moved by the natural.
I think these parts are worthy to meditate on...

"When stimulation comes at us from every side," he writes, "we reach a point where we cannot respond with much depth to anything. Bombarded with so much that is exciting and demands our attention, we tend to become unable to discriminate and choose from among the many options. The result is that we shut down our attention to everything." That is, we get bored.Over-stimulated and bored, we start looking for anything that will give our jaded spirits a lift.

We must recover a sense of passion and wonder.

"Finding interest and joy in life involves active engagement with the world. . . . The person who wants to be involved with life knows that it is necessary to move toward someone or something, to want to understand and know."

Friday, December 26, 2003

We are not human beings having a spiritual experience, but spiritual beings having a human experience.
As C.S. Lewis from Mike's Blog
"Herr Capellmeister, I should like to compose something; how shall I begin?" asked a youth of twelve who played with great skill on the piano. "Pooh, Pooh," replied Mozart, "you must wait."
"But you began when you were younger than I am," said the boy.
"Yes, so I did," said the great composer, "but I never asked anything about it. When one has the spirit of a composer, he writes because he can't help it."
-Pushing to the Front" by Orison S. Marden Published in 1911

Wow this short story struck a deep spiritual nerve in me.
Below is the poem that erupted out of the puncture of that nerve.

You are Wonder!
Oh God, I marvel at what you plant within the forming soul.
Every womb is a new genesis, an eden of wonder!
Mysteries hidden like dreams in the fabric of your creation.

You are Wonder!
Like a prophet gardener you sow seeds of destiny in the heart.
Then at the appointed hour of fading dark, you awaken the dawn!
You speak and out from the dirt of our passions emerging as tender seedlings...the fruit of the future.

You are Wonder!
You're answers lay in the countless fields of desire.
Secret pearls...awaiting desperate and searching hands.

You are Wonder!

Amazing story ahead...
My father sent me this short story about a young woman he saw at a Teen Challenge Benefit Dessert.

"They last person that got up was a younger gal about 22-25. She gave a lead in to her song in a very breathy weak voice. I couldn't imagine how she could sing with the difficulty she had just talking. Sounded like someone with acute asthma. Well, the music began and she broke into action singing a contemporary Christmas Carol with dance moves somewhere between Michael Jackson and a soul sister from the black choir. She used the whole stage and had everyone on their feet clapping and shouting.

It wasn't long before I realized she wasn't singing but was lip synching. She did a great job and the singer sounded like Whitney Houston. Her enthusiasm was contagious and she was the hit of the program.
Turns out she was in an auto accident a couple of years ago and her throat was crushed. What I thought was a choker was actually a device to help her talk.

It had such an impact on me how this young woman who was once a very good singer but now had difficulty speaking, none the less took what she had and gave it her all, to the joy of all. It reminded me of the young lad when asked if he had any food offered a few fish and loaves and it fed the multitude.
She too, took what she had left and it turned into a feast".

I think we all are called upon to take what we have and with the touch of God on it...turn it into a feast.
It reminds me of this verse:"God wants you to give what you have, not what you do not have." -2 Cor. 8:12b.
SO many people struggle over discovering God's will for their lives. Many search or are stuck waiting for "something out there" to reveal to them what they are supposed to do. When in reality, if we drink deeply of the great fountain of God with all our hearts, soul, mind and strength; we will find living water will begin to bubble out from inside of us to others around us. Living water flows from our inner man. Out of the heart the mouth speaks and the issues of life are discovered. We are all like Bezael and Aholiab in Exodus 31:6 & 36:2, we have seeds of destiny within us. When the heart is stirred, we are called to go and do the work. What is stirring in your heart right now?
What work have you been slow in starting because you are "waiting" for what you don't have, instead of using what you already have? Are you listening to your heart?
Have you been stuck in the "stirring" phase and not pressed on to the "work" phase?
Do you believe that God has put the "wisdom" within you and that you need faith to begin to use it?
If not you...then who?
If not now...then when?
If not here...than where?

Wednesday, December 24, 2003

"Myth is necessary because of what man is...because man is fundamentally mythic.
His real health depends upon his knowing and living his ...mythic nature." -Kilby

"Mythic stories help us to see clearly, which is to say, they help us see with the eyes of our hearts.
So cast a wide net, and draw in all those stories that have ever stirred your soul,
quickened your spirit, brought you to tears or joy or heroic imagination.
You will need them all, as you shall see." -from Waking the Dead by John Eldredge

Strange how this has been so true for me, right now.
My heart has been smitten, stirred, awakened, rebuked and moved by chapter 6 of the Return of the King.
The Battle of the Pelennor Fields. One of my favorite parts of the movie too.
These lines are echos of my own current reality:
My heart has whispered more than cried:"King's man! King's man! You must stay by him...".

There is so much more that I could say but I guess that tale will be told at other's a pearl of conversation, reserved for hearts that have shed the same sacrificial blood...

Tuesday, December 23, 2003

Go figure...
Burning the flag is considered free speech; erecting crosses as roadside memorials is not.
The FCC allows the "F-word" on television, but thanking God at a high school graduation is a no-no.
And some schools freely dispense condoms to kids, but pencils that read "Jesus loves little children" were confiscated from a first-grade class in Virginia.
Fox News: Fox News Report December 23rd, 2003
One Eye Blind
Keep one eye on the past and one eye on the future,
you will only be blind in one eye.
But keep two eyes on the future, you will be blind in both"

(-a russian resistance fighter who survived a massacre from the nazis)
Thanks Gaz for the word to chew on...

Monday, December 22, 2003

"It takes God to love God."
-Mike Bickle of FOTB
The Smoking Section
If you want to reach the world, you have to sit in the smoking section.
Neil Cole, who tried to start a "Christian Coffee House", then realized that the people he wanted to reach already had a coffee house and maybe he should just go there. (From the Fisch Tank

1904 Welsh Revival
"Evan Roberts and his brother Dan and his best friend Sidney were travelling the country conducting Revival Meetings and they were meetings with a difference. Meetings which broke the conventional and bi-passed the traditional – often the ministers just sat down unable to preach or even to understand what storm had arrived in their usually sedate temples."
Thanks to the link from someone over at 24-7 prayerabout the 1904 Welsh Revival

As I was preparing for our BLAZE youth conference this last year, I received some words form the Lord about the 1904 revival. It all started when I looked out my window and saw the neighbors address on their house "1904". I felt impressed to look up that date and the first book I opened had an article on the 1904 Welsh revival. We are approaching the 100 year anniversary of that revival.

I am praying to God to see such awakening this year...
Oh, Lord do it in my day.
The Son of God became a man to enable men to become the sons of God.
- C.S. Lewis

Sunday, December 21, 2003

Castrated pony or Stallion?

"We castrate the gelding and bid him be fruitful." -C.S. Lewis

"All his life Gary had been a good boy. A gelding. And geldings, though they are nicer and much more well behaved than stallions, do not bring life. They are sterile."
-John Eldredge (The Journey of Desire)

Do you give the horse his might?
Do you clothe his neck with a mane?
Do you make him leap like the locust?
His majestic snorting is terrible.
He paws in the valley and rejoices in his strength.
He goes out to meet the weapons.
He laughs at fear and is not dismayed;
and does not turn back from the sword.
The quiver rattles against him,
the flashing spear and javelin.
With shaking and rage he races over the ground;
and he does not stand still at the voice of the trumpet.
As often as the trumpet sounds he says, Aha!
And he scents the battle from afar,
and the thunder of the captains,
and the war cry.
-Job 39:19-25

What kind of horse are you?
Safe and good but sterile horse
or wild, strong and potent stallion?

Saturday, December 20, 2003

I see dead people...
ooooo see a ghost here
Happy Festivus for the rest of us!
learn about Festivus Here
December 23rd!
What you win them with is what you win them to.
From the GMAN

The Madness of Denathor

The scene in ROTK that has been churning in me is the whole Denathor story line.
The part where he is eating like a pig and asks Pippin to sing to him...

Fat and gluttonous, lips bloodied by the food, the messy juice of the tomatoes, a gory foreshadowing of the carnage on the battle field. It sickened me. The frustration and despair of Pippin singing and yearning to be or see, more than an empty hall, an overindulgent and cowardly king, and a weakening city.

That whole scene resonated with me on a deep level. Singing instead of warring. Warring foolishly. Feasting while others are fighting. Singing while more noble men are taking their last stand. Growing fat while others are writing their destines. Singing about war while others are living it. Hiding in palaces while others are riding towards death.

God speed the days when the kings will ride out to war once again...

LOTR: The Return of the King

Saw the movie today with my son Christian. We skipped school and work ;) to see it together.
The movie is simply AWESOME!
I was moved at so many parts but I think the story line that got me the most was the Eowyn and Merry part of the movie. Seeing the least likely rise to glory and honor on the edge of valor and courage was simply breathtaking.
I am mesmerized by the imagery of her standing against the Witch King in bold defiance. What a potent mythological theme. I was captivated. I will be back soon to see it again, there was just to much to see, absorb and ponder.
What a masterpiece!

'Do what you will; but I will hinder it, if I may! -Eowyn to the Witch King

Thursday, December 18, 2003

Things NOT to do while watching LotR:

1. Stand up halfway through the movie and yell loudly, "Wait...where on earth is Harry Potter?"
2. Block the entrance to the theater while screaming, "YOU.....SHALL....NOT.....PASS!" - After the movie, say "Lucas could have done it better."
3. Play a drinking game where you have to take a sip every time someone says, "the Ring."
4. Point and laugh whenever someone dies.
5. Ask everyone around you if they think Gandalf went to Hogwarts.
6. Finish off every one of Elrond's lines with "Missster Ander-sonnn."
7. When Aragorn is crowned king, stand up and at the top of your lungs sing, "And I did it.... MY way...!"
8. Talk like Gollum all through the movie. At the end, bite off someone's finger and fall down the stairs.
9. Dress up as old ladies and reenact "The Battle of Helms Deep," Monty Python style.
10. When Denethor lights the fire, shout "Barbecue!"
11. In The Two Towers when the Ents decide to march to war, stand up and shout, "RUN FOREST, RUN!"
12. Every time someone kills an Orc, yell: "That's what I'm Tolkien about!" See how long it takes before you get kicked out of the theatre.
13. During a wide shot of a battle, inquire, "Where's Waldo?"
14. Talk loudly about how you heard that there is a single frame of a nude Elf hidden somewhere in the movie.
15. Start an Orc sing-a-long.
16. Come to the premiere dressed as Frankenfurter and wander around looking terribly confused.
17 When they go in the paths of the dead, wait for a tense moment and shout, "I see dead people!"
18. Imitate what you think a conversation between Gollum, Dobby and Yoda would be like.
19. Release a jar of daddy-long-legs into the theater during the Shelob scene.
20. Wonder out loud if Aragorn is going to run for governor of California.
21. When Shelob comes on, exclaim, "Man! Charlotte's really let herself go!"
The Lord of the Rings is a fundamentally religious and Catholic work; Unconsciously so at first, but consciously in the revision. It was my desire to stay theologically orthodox that led me to avoid being too specific, despite the biblical parallels in the creation story...That is why I have not put in, or have cut out, practically all references to anything like 'religion,' to cults or practices, in the imaginary world...For the religious element is absorbed into the story and into the symbolism.
-J.R.R. Tolkien

Human life is enriched by aspiring to a virtuous, honorable life of valor.
-Dick Staub. reflecting on The Return of the King.
"It's official: Washington State is the country's leading bastion of the unchurched, according to a recent survey. In a massive sampling of 19,761 adults 18 and older during a six-year period, a pollster found that 29 percent of the Evergreen State's populace attend a worship service in a typical week
-- compared with Louisiana, which has a 56 percent weekly attendance, the country's highest."It's always been the Northwest that's been the lowest in church-going," says George Gallup. "It may be the ethos of the state."

Excerpt from this article:

Next to Oregon, WA is the next in line in most unchurched in the nation, that is one of the reasons I value living and doing ministry in the NW.

But I think the difference is in "ACCESS."

The unchurched in the states have a multitude of living, growing, healthy churches to find a real relationship with Jesus. There are countless aggressive evangelistic works that take place in almost every major urban/suburban area or city. There are book stores, radio, TV, videos, movies, missions, multiple social safety net ministries, Christian friends, family and coworkers. Granted even with ALL this going on we are still making a pathetic impact on our culture...we will have to give an account for that to the Lord.

These tools & opportunities are not available in many places within Europe, let alone the other nations of the world. When a majority of missions funds and resources are spent on US mission, I think we need to refocus. Even though the average Christian spends more money on dog food than missions, we still have the biggest piece of the pie.

So I simply seek to stir those who have the pull in their gut to do something about it. Most people don't go, only a few ever will, even Jesus said that there is a need for those who will "GO" into the fields (Luke 10:2).

It's a pretty obvious fact that most people who "stay" really don't "DO" much of anything either...our culture, our churches, our Christian friends castrate or create evangelistically impotent Christians. There is a mass problem of evangelistic sterilization taking place among the saved. Most simply just don't care about the lost, or care but don't allow their compassion to manifest into action.

I am not seeking to be harsh, just real...and the fact is we are losing the war at this pace unless this generation arises to the challenge to obey the last command with a zeal and passion unseen in years.

Tuesday, December 16, 2003

A NOW word
God is blushing ordinary things into extraordinary things right now.
Old ways are being transformed to make way for new days.
Joy is overtaking duty.
There is a table that is being prepared and it is in the presence of your enemies.
Your petitions have a greater chance of being granted at the table of wine.
There is something about passion and first love that awakens favor like nothing else. The Lord loves fervent love.
We must get our banquets in the right order: Presence first, Petition second.
What will you do if the Lord comes to your table?
What will you ask for?
Banquets of wine can hang enemies...

Prophetic word recieved in worship & Prayer...

Thou anointest my head with oil; my cup runneth over.
In the East the people frequently anoint their visitors with some very fragrant perfume; and give them a cup or glass of some choice wine, which they are careful to fill till it runs over. The first was designed to show their love and respect; the latter to imply that while they remained there, they should have an abundance of everything. To something of this kind the psalmist probably alludes in this passage.
-Samuel Burder.

I have been studying out a spiritual vein of gold that the Holy Spirit has been unfolding these last few months.
It has been centered around the words: bread, wine and oil. Yesterday in my time before the Lord, during an interlude of worship, prayer and prophesy on the guitar, the Lord breathed more illumination. The light has revolved around Esther's Banquet in the book of Esther. There is a lot that I am still allowing to ferment in my spirit but the refreshment coming from this word is exhilarating!

Here's a few prophetic words that came springing out of my spiritual well during worship:
* Esther, you must prepare a banquet of wine.
* Your love, the wine of passion is to be set out for the king.
* Two will come to your table...A King and an Enemy.
* Life and Death, two destinies sit at the table.
* Your petition for the lives of your generation is at stake.
* The first banquet is always about being with the king.
* The second banquet was for petitioning the king.

I am mesmerized by the first miracle of Jesus.
Turning water into wine is such a potent image of that which Jesus was ushering in. What a sign!
John knew the blushing of plain old ceremonial water to the "Best Wine" was a sign of good days ahead.
I wish I could of been there in that moment; watching that wine being poured out.
I am almost positive they allowed that cup to overflow with that mystical, heavenly prophetic wine.
I am sure Psalms 23:5 was whispered out of astonished lips.
My cup runneth over.
Wherefore doth the Lord make you cup run over, but that other men's lips might taste the liquor? The showers that fall upon the highest mountains, should glide into the lowest valleys. "Give, and it shall be given you", is a maxim little believed.
-William Secker.
My cup runneth over.
Or as it is in the Vulgate: And my inebriating chalice, how excellent it is! With this cup were the martyrs inebriated, when, going forth to their passion, they recognised not those that belonged to them; not their weeping wife, not their children, not their relations; while they gave thanks and said, "I will take the cup of salvation!"
-Saint Augustine
Thou anointest my head with oil.
The unguents of Egypt may preserve our bodies from corruption, ensuring them a long duration in the dreary shades of the sepulchre, but, O Lord, the precious perfumed oil of thy grace which thou dost mysteriously pour upon our souls, purifies them, adorns them, strengthens them, sows in them the germs of immortality, and thus it not only secures them from a transitory corruption, but uplifts them from this house of bondage into eternal blessedness in thy bosom.
-Jean Baptiste Massillon, 1663-1742.

Sunday, December 14, 2003

Here is our "fine print" on our youth staff application:
Fine print: You will be exposed to constant bizarre behavior and be required to smile and act like aliens haven't landed and taken over teenage bodies. Might be called upon to burp before a live audience. Must often endure high levels of foot & body odor. Must be able to go without sleep for long periods of time and live on junk food and Mt. Dew. Must be able to handle repetitious annoying remarks about ones body or personality. Be trained in the ancient art of Atomic Wedgies or an equivalent method of student behavioral control. Must love puberty, zits, crush talk, bad breath, loud music, cleaning up, driving, video games, movies, loud talking, repeating yourself over and over again, eating fast food regularly, dropping kids off & picking them up at the last minute before everything, wearing ear plugs, spinning your head on a bat or some other maturity crushing event thought up by some demented youth worker. Basically your in for a whole lot of stuff that will create a head & heart crammed full of awesome memories and life changing experiences or they will lock you up in the loony bin when it is all said and done.
To Which race of Middle earth do you belong?
Find out here
Would be theologians...must be on their guard lest by beginning too soon to preach they rather chatter themselves into Christianity than live themselves into it and find themselves at home there.
-Soren Kierkegaard as recorded in his journal, July 11, 1838
Thanks Jimmyfor the quote

Scrubbed off the roots
I believe we’ve lost a down-to-earth spirituality. Over a 2,000-year period, we’ve jerked and tugged the Christian faith out of its original soil. Henry David Thoreau warned that words—when derived properly—come with the earth still clinging to their roots. But the earth has been shaken and scrubbed off the roots of our faith to the point where much of our fruit has become juiceless—as dry and sour as an old lemon.
by Leonard Sweet

I think a lot of what I hear christians speak about is "words without earth". So much is so void of real down to earth issues. I don't want messages with the earth scrubbed off. In fact, I wish there was a whole lot more earth, maybe then we could find real practical substance to walk on.

I had a dream last night and in it, was a former Assembly of God superintendent that I used to work under. He was a real big wig in the AG at the time, a nice guy for sure but generally party line. In my dream he was speaking to a postmodern young guy and was using the word S**t a lot in his conversation. In my dream I was dumbfounded at the "dirt" that was clinging to his words. I know in most circles that dirt would be hastily "scrubbed off" but in my dream it actually made sense. Strange dream.

Saturday, December 13, 2003

Wrestling with Dragons...

I saw an angel come down from heaven with the key to the bottomless pit and a heavy chain in his hand.
He seized (gripped and overpowered) the dragon...and bound him in chains for a thousand years.

-Revelations 20:1-2.

Awake, awake, put on strength and might, O arm of the Lord;
awake as in the ancient days, as in generations of long ago.
Was it not You...who pierced the dragon?

-Isaiah 51:9.

Behold, I send you out like lambs into the midst of wolves.
-Jesus (Luke 10:3).

I have given you authority and power to trample upon serpents and scorpions...
- Jesus (Luke 10:19).

I have recently been immersed in the imagery of the desperate battle pictured here.
There are many dragons lurking in our cities; there are so many wolves and lions seeking whom they can devour.

unfortunately there are few willing to go and fight for those who are becoming their prey ( read Isaiah 49:24-26 & Luke 10:2). "Can plunder be taken from warriors or captives from the fierce?" (Is. 49:24). I have wrestled with God about this lately. Even this morning I awoke and heard the call to early morning prayer in my spirit; and yet complained to the Lord about the seeming impotence of these prayers. Does it do any good to weep? Is God really concerned about these "Great Cities" (Jonah 4:11)?

The tragicness of it all, the pain, the hopelessness that so often rides on the winds of momentary victories; it's all so mythic to me.

We stand so close to the mighty overpowering waves that froth and foam with maddening intensity. Their wild dance threatens complete submersion into their dark depths. Yet, still I stand on the edge of sandy shore...and can hear him say...To here and no more...(Is. 51:15)

Thursday, December 11, 2003

Two guys walk into a bar. You'd think one of them would have seen it.
A picture for my spiritual mood right now...
What's Your Fave Christmas Movies?
Mine are:
A Christmas Story
It's A Wonderful Life
And I am going to watch the Chevy Chase one again to see if that's on my list...
Tolkien Who?
I about choked, when she said it. I was trying to ask a secretary at a Christian school if they allowed Tolkien books to be read in their school. I had been invited to speak at their chapel service and I was going to use a section out of chapter 6 of The Return of the King in my message.
She was clueless as to who I was talking about until I mentioned The Lord of the Rings. I was dumbfounded.

Tuesday, December 09, 2003

Maiden of Rohirrim, child of Kings...
A cold voice answered: 'Come not between the Nazgul and his prey!
Or he will not slay thee in thy turn. He will bear thee away to the houses of lamentation,
beyond all darkness, where thy flesh shall be devoured,
and thy shrivelled mind be left naked to the Lidless Eye.'

A sword rang as it was drawn.
'Do what you will; but I will hinder it, if I may.'
'Hinder me? Thou fool. No living man may hinder me!'
...and the clear voice was like the ring of steel.
'But no living man am I! You look upon a woman.
Eowyn I am.
(The Return of the King, Chapter 6, the Battle of the Pelennor Fields)

"She girds herself with strength and makes her arms strong."
Proverbs 31:17

Oh, God for an army of such young women...
Those who have traded the hem for a helm,
the swoon for the sword and a glorious and tragic ending over a lifetime of frivolous vanity.

Pulpits without power...
"We tend to love the altar so much that we refuse to set it on fire.
Yet God comes in the flames. Our God is a consuming fire."
-Erwin R. McManus .Unstoppable Force

Sunday, December 07, 2003 who want rain without thunder and lightning.
I am pondering this phrase that I read: Here.
I am still pondering...I will post after my thoughts coagulates into something less fluid.
This above all, to thine own self be true,
and it must follow, as the night the day,
thou canst not then be false to any man.
- William Shakespeare

False to any man...sheesh, I wish...
Why are You like a stranger in the land,
or like the traveler who has pitched his tent for the night?
...Like a mighty man who cannot save?

-Jeremiah 14:8-9

I have been feeling like this for a couple of days.
My spirit has been so burdened by the immense need all around.
I see so many people that are struggling, falling...leaving.
I read in the paper the other day, how WA largest growing "group" is the "NONE" group.
This group marks no religious affiliation in census forms.

Then I look around my church this morning and basically all I see is grey or graying hairs...

All wonderful people...well...maybe not all...

But there is SUCH a hole...a generation is missing.
I saw someone selling these at Portland Saturday Market a while of my students bought one...
Duck Tape Wallet
I have been dealing with a lot of mental stuff lately, maybe this is what I need:
Aluminum Foil Deflector Beanie

Monday, December 01, 2003

When first things are put first, second things are not suppressed but increased.
- C.S. Lewis
The world is waiting...why are you?
Read Matthew 28:19
"Jesus came to forgive us of our sin, yes, but His mission was also to introduce us to the passion of living. Most people believe that following Jesus is all about living RIGHT. Not true. Following Jesus is all about living FULLY."
-Mike Yaconelli
from: Adam
Oh, how true this really is, so many people miss this reality in their spiritual indoctrination that comes through spoken and unspoken things within our churches and christian relationships. Just look around you, how many people do you know that exude this truth? It saddens me that this is so often the case, we suffer from lack of fully alive people.
I long to be "FULLY ALIVE" in my thought life, my devotional life, my love life, my fathering, my pastoring, my writing, my speech, my recreation, my suffering, my mentoring and in my body.

This made me laugh.
go here
I don't know why, it just did.
Had a dream right before I woke up this morning and in it I heard a verse form Proverbs 31.
So as I opened Proverbs 31, my eyes fell on verse 31, which was the content of what I heard in my dream.
"Give her of the fruit her hands, and let her own works praise her in gates of the city."
This verse spoke to me about getting about the business of writing the books I feel are within me. I spend a lot of time writing but in this new season it is time to take it to the next level.

Last night I also watched a speech by Anne Lamont, a writer. Her talk, really inspired me to get to it, as well. She is a very unconventional person that has had a spiritual new birth. She talked openly about her emerging new life in Christ in very unreligious ways. It was really refreshing to hear and see a writer that is unafraid to speak the truth. the truth of who she is and what has happened to her and what matters to her. It was equally nourishing to hear her do it in a way that didn't reek of christianeeze.

So in response to this prompting, I have printed off all my blog journal and gathered my poems and some of my writings too. I will probably self publish something of my devotional poems and prayers first because they best reveal what I am most passionate in Christ.

Well see where it goes from there.