Friday, December 01, 2006

Would you...or wouldn't you?

OK...I need some help out there.
My wife and I are arguing about whether the below invitation to a
free, afternoon pedicure would be appealing to anyone other than a
homosexual male or girlfriend.

Invitation for my husband:
You and I
side by side
sipping coffee
soaking our feet in a hot, sudsy pool.
A messaging chair gently works on our tired muscles.
Next, we get a full foot and leg message, strong and slow,
while we chatter about our dreams and wishes.
Next of course we get cleaned and clipped and scrubbed,
followed by a paraffin wax, hot and smooth for our rough parts.
Ahh...you wait outside while I finish off with polish.
Wanna join me?

5 comments:

Anonymous said...

So this would be from a wife to her husband?

And not to be Debbie Downer, but it's "massage" :-)

Anonymous said...

By no means do I consider myself the manliest of men (I like Little House on the Prairie), but while I was willing to look past the "sipping" coffee reference, that invitation lost me completely once I got to: "while we chatter about our dreams and wishes." This seems better suited for The View or Coffee Talk with Barbara Ritchie. Almost equally gay is the pitch for the paraffin wax treatment, "hot and smooth for our rough parts." If that phrase isn't in reference to a motor lubricant, it has not place in a mans world. Unless you TiVo the Oxygen channel daily or, as Earl Hickie would say, have had your name substituted for "Queer" in a game of smear the queer, there isn't much appeal here.
-dan

Anonymous said...

No way, not a pedicure, you can just bit you're nails instead...Jackie & I had free wedding private package at a Spa in Post Falls...it was relaxing, yeah ,okay..., HOWEVER, as a 27 yearold white anglo-saxon straight male, I wouldnt pay my own hard earned money to walk around in the nude with a seaweed wrap on my face, sipping champagne while Yanni is being played in the background.

Hope that answers you're question.

Koonz

Todd Bacon said...

Hmm. "Drinking" coffee, soakin' the feet and the massage part isn't so bad, but the rest is quite feminine to be sure. Next you'll be waxing your eyebrows together.

Anonymous said...

I've got one more thing for the table...if the female gender feels its appropriate to entice a male via a lengthy, cushy invitation... "drinking coffee" did ya notice it wasn't about drinking tea!...if any male should try to get roped in, then an invitation should be thrown out to women for " a trip to the mountains to shoot guns" or "wilderness backpacking trip for 3 days" or "A pint at the Irish Pub" "taming wild stallions"
you get the drift:)