Micah is such a such a goofball. 

Sea of glass...

The womb of the dawn
3.17.05

Sea of glass mirrored in the face of the dew,
The womb of the dawn it cries out to You.

Under Your feet lies a prophesy,
A day breaking, a light burning, a hope returning.

A sparkling dream falls every morn,
A vaporous promise rises back,
Breath of fairies, the whispering dance of the virgins.
A hidden message from Your heart.

A silent shedding of heavens tears.
No thunder echoes its coming.
Lightening can’t traces its path.
A quiet beaconing that will too quickly pass.

Glass slippers for our feet,
Each morning worn but cannot keep.
The path of God quickly fading,
Glistening voice for them that are waiting…


This was a prayer/prophesy/song that was woven out of these verses this morning in my time before the Lord. It speaks of a prophesy for the youth of this generation, they belong to the Lord and each morning He speaks to them in the dew of the dawn. As He walks on a sea of glass, so do we each morning and that glass calls to Him to be faithful to His word.
-Eric

In front of it (the throne of God) stretched what seemed a sea of glass,
like a sheet of ice.
–Revelations 4:6

Your people will volunteer on Your day of battle. In holy splendor, from the womb of the dawn, the dew of Your youth belongs to You...
-Psalms 110:3

Nations will come to your light
and kings to the brightness of your dawn.
-Is 60:3

Let all who love thee, be like the sun rising in strength.
–Judges 5:31

Tea...I used to drink tea all the time. Earl Gray was my usual drink of choice. Hot, no sugar or cream just straight tea. There was something ascetic about it that I liked. Plus no one else seemed to drink it, so I was feeling very countercultural. I'd be hanging out with the peeps and the hostess says..."what would you like to drink?" Peeps say..."Mt. Dew, Pepsi, Coffee etc"...and then out of slightly dark corner, from under the brim of his oversized hat, the mysterious stranger whispers eloquently with a hint of an almost English accent...Tea please, Earl Gray tea.
 

Christianity is strange

Christianity is strange; it bids man to recognize that he is vile, and even abominable, and bids him want to be like God. Without such a counterweight his exaltation would make him horribly vain or his abasement horribly abject. -Blaise Pascal (Pensées)  

Avant-garde...

Big Mike...budding underground filmmaker from the upper westside of the bohemian town of Odessa, WA and a great blogger too.

A movie about a holy man who travels to the Norse men and joins them on a search and destroy mission against an invading demon clan based on the prophecies of a Norse soothsayer. It's Braveheart violent, it's gritty, bloody and epic.
It's all about a man who learns to fight with his own sword in his own way.
He learns to speak the language of those he is called to war for and among.
He learns to face his fears and open his heart to a culture and people not like his own, until he is willing to die for them.
It was a NOW word for me...wrapped in cinematic flesh.
 

Naked Tug-O-War...

One of the books I am reading right now...last half is better than the first in my opinion.
So far it's not as wild as the title suggests but it has some real good stuff laced through out.
It's an easy read and worth reading if you like the Wild at heart kind of stuff.

The story about the naked men at the mens retreat was awesome! I laughed out loud at the thought of seeing a bunch of naked guys playing tug o war...oh some people get to break all the rules and get away with it. Imagine the religious uprising that such an act would cause in most churches. We have our own "naked man" at our mens retreat (I won't name names but you know who you are). I thought it was mere antics of a shock jock...now I know that there is a spiritual spin on it too...Get the book, it's worth the money.

Still standing in the Blogolosseum....

So why do I read and write blogs?

I think it's in our primordial blood.

I am full of words and the spirit within me compels me;
inside I am like bottled -up wine, like new wineskins ready to burst.
I must speak and find relief;
I must open my lips and reply.
-Job 32:18-20

In the beginning was the word...simple as that.

It's built within our nature to communicate with others, to share, commune and reveal, to disclose and pronounce, to speak into the void and create. It's THE IMAGE in us...We were created by word, wind and dirt and all three find expression in this technological "little e"...eden.

For me the interaction with and within the swirling amniotic waters of this ever growing digital womb;
has helped form me in ways I wouldn't have experienced;
if I hadn't taken this high speed global expedition.

I have been set free from my geographical, socioeconomic, religious and geo-political boxes. I have been allowed to go adventuring, exploring and the walk has done me good. It's led me to connect with people in ways I would of never been able too in the past. It's taken me literally to other continents through the connections made here.

But...there is something more for me in this; the net is also a new era "Blogolosseum".
It's adversarial.
It's a place to wrestle, attack and be attacked without the shedding of real blood. That might be a pro or con, I am not sure? Net anonymity has a liberating and castrating effect on some. It can put words in an otherwise silent mouth or turn a virtual kiss into a Judas kiss in the click of a mouse.

It's a very naked high dive experience that everyone can see but only you can overcome the willies and take the plunge. Will you find a community noose that yanks you into a violently expulsing display of your tender innards or a pool of rebirth that transports you to the highest planes of incandescent lucidity?

Probably both...but there is something very reincarnational about it all.

Your phoenix rises out of the ashes of your flaming experience and you find your hide thicker from the verbal tanning. You are more keen and shrewd because of it all. A wizening of the serpent has taken place that wouldn't have happened unless you came out into the open air of the Blogolosseum.

Take hold of the flame...

We see the light of those who find
A world has passed them by
To late to save a dream that's growing cold
We realize that fate must hide its face
From those who try
To see the distant signs of unforetold
Oh... oh, take hold

From a haze came a rage of thunder
Distant signs of darkness on the way
Fading cries scream of pain and hunger
But in the night the light will guide your way
So take hold of the flame
Don't you see life's a game
So take hold of the flame
You've got nothing to lose, but everything to gain

Ride, to a place beyond our time
Reach, for the edges of your mind, and you are there
See, that the light will find its way
Back to a place where it will stay, make it stay

Throw down the chains of oppression that bind you
With the air of freedom the flame grows bright
We are the strong, the youth united
We are one, we are children of the light

So take hold of the flame
Don't you see life's a game
So take hold of the flame
You've got nothing to lose, but everything to gain.
-Queensryche

(My most recent iTunes download for my iPod...Thank God for the iPod!)

Revenge...

Ooooooh the movie trailer last night was so awesome!
Revenge Of The Sith opens on May 19th!
Next to the LOTR, these movies make my blood move.

Polywogs and mushrooms...

"It so happens in the mud and slime of the river Borborus, when the eye of the sun hath long dwelt upon it, and produces frogs which begin to move a little under a thin cover of its own parental matter, and if they can get loose to live half a life, that is all; but the hinder parts, which are not formed before the setting of the sun, stick fast in their beds of mud, and the little moiety of a creature dies before it could be well said to live.

So it is with those Christians, who will do all that they think lawful, and will do no more than what they suppose necessary; they do but peep into the light of the Sun of righteousness; they have the beginnings of life; but their hinder parts, their passions and affections, and the desires of the lower man, are still unformed; and he that dwells in this state, is just so much of a Christian, as a sponge is of a plant, and a mushroom of a shrub; they may be as sensible as an oyster, and discourse at the rate of a child, but are generally short of the righteousness evangelical." - Jeremy Taylor
(ouch...thanks Dad, I think?)

Walking...

Henry David Thoreau on Walking:
"I have met with but one or two persons in the course of my life who understood the art of Walking, that is, of taking walks, --who had a genius, so to speak, for sauntering: which word is beautifully derived 'from idle people who roved about the country, in the Middle Ages, and asked charity, under pretence of going a la Sainte Terre,' to the Holy Land, till the children exclaimed, 'There goes a Sainte-Terrer,' a Saunterer, --a Holy-Lander.

They who never go to the Holy Land in their walks, as they pretend, are indeed mere idlers and vagabonds; but they who do go there are saunterers in the good sense, such as I mean. Some, however, would derive the word from sans terre, without land or a home, which, therefore, in the good sense, will mean, having no particular home, but equally at home everywhere. For this is the secret of successful sauntering. He who sits still in a house all the time may be the greatest vagrant of all; but the saunterer, in the good sense, is no more vagrant than the meandering river, which is all the while sedulously seeking the shortest course to the sea. But I prefer the first, which, indeed, is the most probable derivation. For every walk is a sort of crusade, preached by some Peter the Hermit in us, to go forth and reconquer this Holy Land from the hands of the Infidels.

It is true, we are but faint-hearted crusaders, even the walkers, nowadays, who undertake no persevering, never-ending enterprises. Our expeditions are but tours, and come round again at evening to the old hearth-side from which we set out. Half the walk is but retracing our steps. We should go forth on the shortest walk, perchance, in the spirit of undying adventure, never to return, --prepared to send back our embalmed hearts only as relics to our desolate kingdoms. If you are ready to leave father and mother, and brother and sister, and wife and child and friends, and never see them again, --if you have paid your debts, and made your will, and settled all your affairs, and are a free man, then you are ready for a walk."
-From: Purse Lip square Jaw (The photo is from my trip to the Grotto in Portland OR.)

amen...

Christianity is strange; it bids man to recognize that he is vile, and even abominable,
and bids him want to be like God. Without such a counterweight his exaltation would make him horribly vain or his abasement horribly abject." -Blaise Pascal, from Pensées

Today's prayer:
Remember, merciful Jesus, That I am the cause of your journey.
-Mozart's Requiem

I'm hooked...

It's Stallone month...I recently picked up his new men's magazine SLY and watched his new boxing reality show last night, The Contender. The show was awesome! I haven't been that pumped during a show in a while. I was so rooting for the underdog last night and he won...what a great fight that was. I am sooooo hooked (pardon the pun).

More alive than you...

Some of this guys cartoons are brilliant in my opinion.
See more of them here, warning: not all are very positive or ready for the church bulletin but...
I like them nonetheless. I like the simplicity of them, the sharp wit...probably very similar reasons as to why I like quotes. They are like small arrows, they pierce where bludgeoning blows of narrative are easily dodged.

So deep, I'm drowning...

You may never reach the summit; for that you will be forgiven. But if you don't make at least one serious attempt to get above the snow-line, years later you will find yourself lying on your deathbed, and all you will feel is emptiness...I've seen it so many times.

Call him Ted. A young kid in the big city, just off the bus, wanting to be a famous something: artist, writer, musician, film director, whatever. He's full of fire, full of passion, full of ideas. And you meet Ted again five or ten years later, and he's still tending bar at the same restaurant. He's not a kid anymore. But he's still no closer to his dream. His voice is still as defiant as ever, certainly, but there's an emptiness to his words that wasn't there before.

This is an excerpt from probably the best article I have ever read on creativity. You can read it here if you dare. Simply profound and masterfully written in parts. It's not a Christian article and does contain many offensive words and such but if you can throw out what is crude there is some amazing wisdom throughout.

What Super Power?

If you could have any super power, what would it be?

Elasticity:

Flying:

Amazing Strength:

Ice:

Force Fields:

Invisibility:

X-ray Vision:

Invincibility:

Breathing Underwater:

Utility Belt:

Super Speed:

Weather Control:

Bulletproof:

other:

With a set of pipes like this, I simply could not resist downloading the new CD by the recently reunited Judas Priest. It's called Angel Of Retribution, a theme based album that completes their Sad wings of Destiny album. The verdict still is out for me. I am not sure what I think, it didn't blow me away as much as I hoped it would, but it has some really good moments too. A few songs stink and a few are a bit too dark for my tastes.
But there are some choice selections...Judas rising, Deal with the devil are two of my faves on the project. Judas Rising opens with some screaming guitars and Rob Halfords second to none metal vocals come blazing through like a jet engine roaring out of a bombing sweep. Peeling the pop music pruned skin right off my pudgy middle aged face.
I just love to hear a good screaming metal song...not the guttural wails of most metal these days that sounds more like someone possessed than singing. Most stuff sounds like Freddy Krugar singing songs with leatherface than good hard rock, it gives me the creeps.
 

Here is the ceiling in the Bellagio hotel, made of stain glass. 

The Bellagio Hotel in Las Vegas. LeeElla took this picture during her recent trip to sin city. 

Happy birthday to you... 

Micah about to blow the house down. 

We had Micah's 5th birthday party with family last night. It was a Starwars party. Here he is as Anakin. 

oh the agony...

Writing is easy.
All you do is stare at a blank sheet of paper until drops of blood form on your forehead.
-Gene Fowler

little stream...

The greatest of oceans can't offer you a cup of good drink,
yet the lowliest of streams can refresh you with its small but sweet waters.

Raging rivers, booming their threatening voice forward like a charging wall of horses,
is sure to awaken wonder like thunder frightens a timid child.
Yet, the quiet melodies of a meandering secluded brook,
mesmerizes the jaded soul out of its catatonic spell like the kiss of tender and moist lips.
Each ripple, soft as breath but as life altering,
as the moment Lazarus heard his name spoken once again.

Deep waters alluring mystery beckon us like a sirens voice,
but the whispers of bubbling glass dancing over small stones,
calls to our hearts like the fragrance of mothers embrace.
One can drown in the depths of a mountain shedding its winter coat,
but one can be born anew in the mirrors found in quietly gathering pools.

One can pass in the streams closest to the sanctuary,
but cannot ford the wild waters farther away.
Let go of chasing angels; abandon measuring depths that only celestials can fathom,
and being content to find waters too walk within is my present wisdom.
-Written 2.25.05.

I was inspired this morning by Henery Ward Beecher's chapter in Star Papers called "Springs and Solitude".
I turned the chapter into song in my morning devotions and out of that song came this poem. I love how literature breeds contemplation and contemplation births music and music turns to prayer and prayer marries ink and on and on it flows...

Our deepest fear...

"Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure. It is our light, not our darkness, that most frightens us. We ask ourselves, who am I to be brilliant, gorgeous, talented, and fabulous? Actually, who are you not to be? You are a child of God. Your playing small doesn't serve the world. There's nothing enlightened about shrinking so that other people won't feel insecure around you. We are all meant to shine, as children do. We are born to make manifest the glory of God that is within us. It's not just in some of us, it's in everyone. And as we let our own light shine, we unconsciously give other people permission to do the same. As we are liberated from our own fear, our presence automatically liberates others." Mirianne Williamson. I know that this woman isn't a Christian teacher but I think she hits on a important point about living out the new creation life. Who we are is so much more than who we have been. Who we will become by God's indwelling and transforming life is so much more than we can ever comprehend. You are in Christ and to be in Him has eternal and temporal ramifications of eternal consequence.

Some of my Favorite Things:
- reading good books
- buying good books
- clean laundry room
- europe
- receiving real letters in the mail
- fresh dark coffee
- pictures
- a clean house
- patchouli incense
- snuggles with Micah, my youngest son
- big Macs, Tokyo teriyaki, Mongolian food and pizza
- the view from the top of Mt. Schweitzer ID on a clear day
- the smell of caves
- finishing a good book
- my suede coat that I bought for around $8 at Value Village
- long, hot showers
- emails from people that matter
- our suede comforter
- early summer mornings
- warm and mellowing summer evenings
- reading while it is raining with the window open to hear the sound
- picking blackberries
- finishing a poem that captures what I feel
- the smell and sound of the Pacific ocean
- being somewhere else with my honey
- fishing streams
- spending hours at Powell’s Books in Portland OR
- swimming in deep, clear water
- going to the movies
- The Lord of The Rings books and movies
- summer camp with our youth church
- my fathers garden
- when home is quiet because everyone is doing something productive
- worship with our youth church
- the sound of birds in the morning
- a good rock song
- a good worship or praise song
- a good video game
- chess
- freshly mowed lawn
- drawing a good picture
- a good kiss from my wife
- good red wine with a good meal
- a dark beer with good friends 

“Never Forget! The higher we soar the smaller we appear to those who cannot fly.”
-Friedrich Nietzche, 19th century german Philosopher

If you loathe my loathing...

I know its negative, brash and caustic, unfortunately that's the raw me on certain issues. Obviously we all seek to water down our rudeness and aim to harness our darker natures but they are there and writing is a good tool to release the dogs for a run. This blog is a chance to get off the leash for a while.

If we always seek to write, as we think others think we should write, we will never find our own voice. Moralizing every drop of ink is innocuous and leads to an impotent pen. Dancing lightly over issues and always sanitizing them with antibacterial scrubs leaves one with a dangerously vulnerable voice.

We need our dirt...it bolsters our immune system towards dull group think.
We need independent voice and often it takes the adolescence of thought to arrive at the maturity of wisdom.
Writing is very cathartic but the process leaves a bloody mess sometimes.

What is the seal of attained freedom? -No longer being ashamed in front of oneself.
-Friedrich Nietzsch

Things I loathe...

· Nail chewing…oh the germs that hide there.
· Corporate greed…sticking it to the little man
· Offering grace to the sinned against but not the sinner.
· The sexualizing of everything for young girls…do they need thongs?
· Parents that don’t change their kids diapers…I’m suffocating here!
· Bland buildings…is that all we can come up with too meet in?
· Art free churches…and we serve a God who created a lily?
· Chewing with your mouth open…please shut it.
· Girls who cuss…and you eat with that mouth?
· People who don’t choose too shower or wear deodorant.
· People who won’t have children, when there are so many in need of adoption…do you really need all that stuff anyway?
· Slow and inconsiderate waiters/waitresses…your tip is on the line here Betty.
· When people can’t talk about anything deeper than E channel or ESPN…shoot me in the head please.
· Anything by boy bands or smut and butt singers…put some clothes on you bimbos and pimps.
· When you buy a 2 litter of pop and its flat…arrrrrgh!
· Overly sensitive people….toughen up baby.
· Teen girl singers who start out sweet and go smutty.
· Boring sermons…absolutely nothing more sinful.
· Sappy, plastic unrealistic worship music…no I can’t worship to anything, sorry.
· Getting in the car and its on empty…oh this sizzles my bacon.
· Eye goobers and snot…oh please, please look in the mirror once in awhile, will ya?
· Spiders…oh how I loathe arachnids with such a passion.
· Moss and weeds in my lawn…I am going to kick Adam in the butt for this one.
· Dirty homes…how hard is it to clean up after yourselves?
· No clean laundry…nuff said.
· Cheap beer…if you can’t pay for good beer, don’t drink it bud.
· When people leave peanut butter or jelly on the jars.
· Skinny girls…eat a Big Mac please, your innards and bones are showing and it is grossing me out.
· Thong underwear…get over your Victoria self, floss is for teeth anyways.
· Girls who can’t find a kennel for their puppies…if you have to hike it, than you shouldn’t buy it.
· Girls who bathe themselves in perfume and body sprays…choke, gag, gasp…
· That I suck at speeelling.
· That I am too timid…stupid man pleaser.
· That I don’t have anything in savings.
· That I have not had medical insurance for over 12 years. Thanks.
· Women who can’t say anything positive about their husbands.
· Men who can’t pull their heads out of their ass and love their wives.Stupid and slow drivers…can’t you read the signs…this is a freeway not a golf course.

Am I Judas for listening to Priest....

OK...a little confession here, I really like this band. Can a pastor like a heavy metal band such as Judas Priest? I just cant think of a band that plays better hard music. They have a new CD coming out March 1st with Rob Halford back in the drivers seat. Ripper Owens was a good stand in after Halford left the band but not just the same thing as the priest front man himself. My only regret from my teen years is that I didn't get to see these bad boys live. I hope to remedy that if they come to the Northwest to tour this new album. Man, am I really that old that I am going to a reunion tour...how pathetic.

Beastly beard dreams...

Ok, I admit it, I want to be a Viking. The only thing that really sucks about my life is that I can't grow a really good head of hair anymore. That really puts the nail in the coffin for the Viking look. I can grow a really good beard though but it just doesn't go over that well in this home. Come on! Every man should be able to grow a beastly beard once in his life. I am still holding out for the miracle cure for baldness and if it comes, I am growing my Viking mane. Then when I return to Norway and ride on the ocean I can feel real cool.

Wanted: Dead or Alive...

Here is Jim Olson and me singing Wanted: Dead or Alive by Bon Jovi. We won best karaoke that night...oh the grand achievements I have reached, all by the tender young age of 34.

This is Alex, a member of our youth church, doing a cover of a Brittany Spears song at our February Formal. It's non-date event, a chance to eat an expensive dinner at a nice restaurant and get all dressed up with pictures, friends and entertainment. We rented a karaoke machine this year and it was a hit.
 

Jesse and Neue, two of my favorite people and not bad youth leaders too...though they are a little loopy.